Drowning My Sorrows

I try to drown my sorrows away and ended up bringing more to my life.
How can I break my own heart by putting false hopes in my head?
Don't break my heart, it's already been torn apart.
Hold it in your hand as if your life depended on it's very survival.
I close my eyes and try to pretend the words were never said.
Oh God how did I let this happen again?
Stop the pain and stop the hurt, God let me drown in my sorrows.
Take me out of my misery and let me be at peace.
My words can no longer form words as my chances slowly start to fade.
How did I let this happen?
How did I screw up this time?
I only wanted the pain to go away and yet I brought more that is here to stay.
I try to make this seem so normal and yet the thoughts of a chance slowly start to disappear from view.
I wonder if I was dead, would it be so much easier for the world.
I don't seem to care anymore.
Help me not to care, just take the gun and put the lead where it needs to be.
Quit trying to save me, quit trying to say everythings okay.
I hope that when I leave this Earth behind I'm no longer on everyone's mind.
I don't even know where I'm going with this.
I don't even know if I can survive this life anymore.
So as my heart beats in your hand, where do I go from here?